Let's Make Love Potion
by angelsinstead
Summary: In this comedy story several characters from One Life to Live drink a love potion causing them to fall in love with the 1st person they see.  Characters include: Todd, Marty, Tina, John, Blair, Roxie, Natalie, plus many more
1. Chapter 1

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is my comedy story which is loosely based off several characters from the hit soap One Life to Live.

Also, I'd like to note that I do not own ABC's One Life to Live or the characters and I will NOT be receiving any payment whatsoever for writing this story. It is intended for entertainment purposes only.

~*Llanfair*~

It was Valentine's Day, and Todd was hosting a huge party at Vicki's. He had invited half of Llanview. Todd was preparing the snacks in the kitchen. There were heart-shaped cookies, cherry-red punch, and other tasty goodies. Todd was helping himself to a few of the refreshments as he got everything ready for the party. "Todd, what do you think you are doing?" Tina gasped when she walked in to see him gobbling down a cookie.

"What does it look like I am doing? I'm eating a heart-shaped cookie!" Todd growled.

"Those are for the party! Don't ask me to ever help you decorate for a party again, Todd!" Tina grumbled.

"Then tell your dog to keep her little furry butt off my party favors!" yelled Todd.

"You know what? You're really annoying! Vicki should have kicked you out months ago! You're not my brother!" As she complained, Tina hit Todd over the head with a wooden spoon. He howled in pain.

Just then the doorbell rang, signalling that the first guests had arrived. Tina got all excited and did a little dance around the kitchen. "The guests are here!" she cried out.

"Well, go answer the door then. I am gonna finish up here in the kitchen. I'll be out in a sec," Todd said with a litttle smirk. After Tina left to answer the door, Todd pulled out the two little vials labeled "Love Potion." They had arrived in the mail about a week ago with a card that said, *Serve this potion in the beverage of your choice and you will immediately be irrestistable to the opposite sex.*

"A lot of hot babes are gonna be here tonight. I haven't had sex in EIGHT long years, but I am gonna get me some tonight," Todd stated with a naughty little grin.

Todd withdrew the red vial from the envelope and carefully uncorked it. As he whistled merrily, he began pouring it into the punch. He was in the middle of pouring when someone walked into the kitchen. He looked up to see Marty catching him being bad.

"Todd, what the hell are you pouring into the punch?" Marty demanded.

"Ohhh it's nothing!" Todd denied, immediately hiding the vial behind his back.

"Let me see that!" Marty insisted as she tried to grab his hand.

"No!" he exclaimed, dropping the vial as she attempted to take it from him. Unfortunately, the partially-filled vial had landed in David Vicker's doggy bowl.

"Todd, I saw you putting something in the punch!" Marty accused him.

"No, I didn't. I'm a good boy," he denied.

"You don't have a good bone in your body."

"Hey, Marty, would you like some punch?" he asked her with a smirk as he used a crystal laddle to dip her up a cup of the bright red liquid.

Marty folded her arms across her chest. "No, I don't think so," she responded with a frown.

"DAMN!" Todd groaned in disappointment. Unfortunately, it didn't look as though he'd get to try out the potency of the potion on Marty. If there was one woman he wanted to be irrestistable to; it was her.

"What's the matter, Todd?" she asked when she saw the crushed look on his face.

"Nothin'," he said with a little pout as he hid the pink vial in his pocket. Later he would slip a little bit of the potion into Marty's drink. By the end of the night, he vowed, she was gonna be his.

~*Irene's Compound*~

Meanwhile at Irene Manning's compound, she was working on a new secret concoction. As she poured different combinations of chemicals into test tubes, she was hoping to come up with the perfect potion to aid her in her sinister plans. "What are you working on, your evilness?" Agent Baker asked her.

"Something that will kill my son Todd and all his friends and family!" responded Irene with a wicked cackle.

"Wait? Didn't you already make that deadly potion? It was in the little pink and red vials, right? The ones that were labeled 'Love Potion?'" Agent Baker questioned.

"No, you dimwit! That was an experimental potion I prepared to make Mitch Lawrence fall madly in love with me!" Irene cried out.

"Ohhh shit! I thought that the Love Potion in the vials was what you wanted me to send to your son Todd for his party he's having in Llanview. I mailed the vials to him anonymously about a week ago."

"You stupid shit-head! You are going to turn half of Llanview into horny, love-starved fools!" Irene screeched as she broke a test tube over Agent Baker's head in her violent fury.

"I'm sorry," Agent Baker snivelled.

"Did you send him all of the vials?" demanded Irene.

"No, there's one left..." He held up the tiny vial as Irene glared at him.

"Drink it!" Irene screamed at him.

"But, your meanness..." he said in a sob.

"Drink it now... or I'll kill you!" she ordered.


	2. Chapter 2

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is my comedy story which is loosely based off several characters from the hit soap One Life to Live.

Also, I'd like to note that I do not own ABC's One Life to Live or the characters and I will NOT be receiving any payment whatsoever for writing this story. It is intended for entertainment purposes only.

~*Irene's Compound*~

Irene had forced Agent Baker to drink the concoction in the little red vial. He had a pleasant smile on his face because the potion tasted just like cherries. "Oooo, this is delicious," he said as he was licking his lips. He laid his eyes on Irene, and that's when all the trouble started. He started feeling hot all over and his palms started to sweat. He felt like a wild horse that was hot for it's mate.

"Hey, your wickedness, why don't you come on over here and give me some sugar?" said Agent Baker as he batted his eyelashes at her.

"You don't impress me much," Irene stated. "I like evil men, such as Mitch Lawrence, Victor Lord, or Carlo Hesser."

"Well, Victor Lord is dead, and Mitch Lawrence is locked up behind prison bars. Who knows where the hell Carlo Hesser is. But I am here and I am a sexy, hot-blooded male, and I want you. Whattya say you and me go off into the bedroom and make some cute little babies?" suggested Agent Baker.

"I wouldn't fuck you if you were the last man on earth."

"PLEASE I truly need fucked. Just fuck me. PLEASE!" Agent Baker pleaded.

"No, use your hand!" Irene insisted.

With a lustful gleam in his eyes, Agent Baker stepped forward, cornering Irene against the wall of the lab. "Give me your lovin'," he said with a smirk.

"Don't touch me or I will put your penis in a shrinking device!" she warned.

"My penis throbs for you, your meanness!" he said as he reached out and fondled her breast.

She slapped at his hand, but it was too late. He was humping her leg just like a dog. He panted as he was getting off while humping her. "Stop you, filthy mongrel!" she yelled as she was hitting him.

"Oooo slap me!" he begged. "I like it rough!"

~*Llanfair*~

Both Natalie and Roxie had just arrived at the Valentine's party. They both went to mingle with the people in the living room. Vicki and Tina were chatting with the guests. Natalie saw that John was there as well as Brody Lovett. She wasn't too happy to see Brody. She gave him a nasty glare. "Natalie ~ honey, I am so thirsty. I forgot to bring my flask of whiskey along. Do you know if there are any refreshments at this party?" Roxie asked.

"Yes, I think my Uncle Todd is making the refreshments in the kitchen right now," Natalie answered.

"Ohhh great. Why don't you and I go see about getting something to drink? Does Vicki have any Vodka? Or something stronger, such as Everclear?"

Natalie laughed. "I don't know... but we can see what we can find," she said as she and Roxie headed toward the kitchen.

Tina was talking to Brody Lovett. "So, do you get out of St. Anne's much?" she asked him.

"No, not much... but they let me out for good behavior. I'm not really sure how I got invited to this party, but Sister Mary Agnes had to come with me to make sure I stay out of trouble," Brody answered as he referred to the nun standing nearby talking to John McBain. "All the nuns at the facility just love me. They say I am the best-looking thing they've ever laid eyes on. They like to watch me when I am working out."

"I bet they do," said Tina with a little smirk.

Tina's dog, David Vickers ran up, wagging her little tail. She jumped up on Brody's leg and licked his hand. "Ohhh David Vickers thinks you're cute too," said Tina with a little giggle.

"She's an adorable little dog," Brody said as he knelt down to rub David Vicker's tummy.

Rama and Vimal arrived at the party at almost the same time as Kim and her brother Cutter. Cutter was freshly out of prison and in the partying mood. "Bring on the babes, he said as he walked into the room where everyone was chatting. "This looks like a fun party," Rama said to her husband. "I'm so glad that Todd invited us."

Vimal smiled at Rama as they walked over to talk to Tina and Vicki. "Where's Todd?" Vimal asked.

"Ohhh he's still in the kitchen, working on the refreshments. He should be here soon," Vicki answered.

"Vicki," Tina whined. "I think Todd's eating all the cookies. I worked so hard on all the decorations and making everything nice for this party, and Todd just ruins everything."

"Don't worry, Tina. I am sure that this party is going to be just fine. In fact, I am predicting everyone will have loads of fun," said Vicki. "You never know, some of our guests might even find some Valentine romance tonight."

Natalie and Roxie entered the kitchen where Todd was stirring the punch. Marty had just stepped out in the rose garden for a little fresh air. "Oooo that punch looks so good. Did you spike it?" Roxie asked Todd.

"You could say that," Todd spoke with a smirk.

"Great, I gotta have some." Before he could stop her, Roxie had dipped up a cup and started to drink it in a couple of giant gulps.

"So delicious. It tastes just like cherries," Roxie told Todd as she gave him a smile.

"I'm glad you like it," Todd responded.

"You know, you're looking kind of cute tonight, Toddy-Boy. Did you start working out or something?" Roxie asked as she walked forward and began caressing Todd's muscles through his shirt. "You've got a to-die-for, sexy body."

"Roxie, get your hands off Todd," Natalie said as Roxie was repeatedly feeling up her uncle.

Todd looked nervous as Roxie was fondling his muscles. "Help!" he said in a little squeek.

Meanwhile, David Vickers had scurried into the kitchen. She ran up toward her doggy bowl and began lapping at her water. She drank and drank until her thirst was quenched. Just then, Clint walked into the kitchen, nearly tripping on the little dog.

"Sorry, David Vickiers, did I almost step on your tail?" Clint asked as he bent down to pet the little pooch.

Looking at Clint, David Vickers suddenly went into heat. She started drooling and panting, chasing Clint around the kitchen. "What in the world is going on in here?" Vicki gasped when she walked in and saw all the chaos.

"I dunno, Mom. Something crazy is going on," stated Natalie.


	3. Chapter 3

~*~Llanfair~*~

Jessica had just gotten Bree and Ryder into bed. She switched out the light in their bedroom and headed downstairs to the party her uncle Todd was throwing in celebration of Valentine's Day. She had a feeling she might see Brody at the party, and she wasn't sure how she'd feel about seeing her ex. She was trying to move on with her life, but it wasn't easy, because Tess kept trying to emerge whenever she was stressed.

As she walked down the hallway, Jessica passed a full-length mirror. She stared at her reflection, but it was Tess that she saw looking back at her. "Where do you think you are going, dressed like that?" Tess taunted her. "No guy is going to want you!"

Jessica smoothed the silk fabric of her dress over her breasts as Tess laughed cruelly at her appearance. "Ohhh shut up, Tess. I look FINE... and besides, I am not looking for a guy. I am through with guys for a very long time."

"Don't lie to yourself, Jessica. You want a guy!" Tess said with a nasty sneer. "You want to get in Brody's pants again... don't you? Or maybe you'd rather have John McBain?"

"John!" Jessica gasped. "What makes you think I'd want him?"

Tess just laughed hysterically. "Go on down to the party, honey... and have a LOT of fun. But when you least expect it, I am gonna come out... and I am gonna have myself a WHOLE lot of fun!"

"I hate you," Jessica said to her alter.

"That's nice," Tess laughed. "Because I hate you, too."

Jessica rolled her eyes and walked away from her reflection. She wasn't going to let Tess spoil her fun. It was time to enjoy the party and forget all her troubles.

She walked downstairs just as a bunch of guests had arrived. She saw Tea DelGado enter with Blair Cramer. Jessica smiled at the guests as they entered the foyer. She saw Tomas DelGado and his son Baz, followed by her uncle Bo, Aunt Nora, and David Vickers. Shaun, Rex, and John McBain had just arrived as well.

Jessica felt herself blushing as she glanced over at John. For some reason, Tess had thought that she was hot for him. *Tess is just jealous because I won't let her out so she can get laid,* Jessica thought as she went to mingle with a few of the guests.

~*~o~*~

"What in the world is going on here?" Vicki gasped as David Vickers, Tina's little dog was chasing after Clint with lustful intentions. The cute little pooch was panting as she was humping Clint's leg in a frantic motion.

"David Vickers! Bad girl!" Tina scolded as she walked into the kitchen and saw her doggie humping Clint's leg. "Ooooo I knew we should have gotten her spayed!"

She grabbed her little dog and placed her in her doggy kennel. "You just stay in there and think about the naughty thing you have done," Tina said to David Vickers. "You have to stop being such a Doggy-Ho."

"Tina, what's gotten into your dog?" Vicki asked her sister.

"I'm not really sure. I just came into the kitchen to get some of that punch Todd made to serve to the guests. Everyone's thirsty and asking for refreshments," Tina explained.

"Todd made a huge bowl of punch, so please take as much as you'd like to the guests. I need to stay here in the kitchen though for awhile. I am afraid Todd needs my help with ... something."

"What?! Did he eat all the cookies?" Tina asked.

"No," Vicki said as she shook her head. "Look over there."

Vicki pointed over to their brother who was being fondled repeatedly by Roxie. "What's Roxie doing?" Tina asked with a frown.

"It would appear that she's feeling up our brother. I would say that she's had a bit too much to drink."

"Mom, come here!" Natalie called out as she tried to pull Roxie off Todd.

"You go serve the punch, Tina. I need to help our brother," Vicki said.

~*~Irene's Compound~*~

Agent Baker released his giant plumper and tried to entice Irene with it. "Get that THING away from me!" she shrieked.

"Just stroke it, your meanness!" he pleaded.

"It disgusts me!"

"I know you want me... because you made me drink that love potion, knowing what it would do to me," Agent Baker stated. "And just look what it did. It's given me a thick erection that will probably last for hours!"

Irene tried to escape the lab and Agent Baker's erection, but he grabbed her and lay her down none-too-gently on an exam table. "You will regret this!" she yelled as he locked her wrists into iron restraints.

"It's time you discovered what's it's like to be at someone else's mercy," Agent Baker quipped.

~*~Llanfair~*~

Tina walked into the living room of Llanfair with a large pitcher of cherry-red punch. As the guests came forward, she began to serve Todd's delicious concoction. John McBain was the first one to walk over and take a glass.

"This looks delicious. I'm parched," he said as he took a sip of the ruby liquid. In that same moment, Tomas DelGado came forward to take his own glass. He brushed against John as he walked away from the refreshment table.

Suddenly, John's vision went blurry. He no longer saw Tomas as a man. In John's eyes, Tomas was a sexy, beautiful young woman with firm jumbos and a curvaceous bottom. "Hello there," John said as he gave Tomas a sexy grin.

"How would you like to go somewhere private for a little ... fun?" John asked Tomas as he gave him a wink.

"Excuse me?" Tomas asked in disbelief.

Meanwhile, Rick had taken his own glass of punch. After he had consumed a large sip of the cool liquid, Rick was approached by Nate. "I need your help," Nate said to Rick. "I am totally broke... and I was wondering, would you be presuaded to make another porno?"

"Sure," Rick said with a devilish smirk. "I've always wanted to make a porno with you."

After he consumed a huge glass of Todd's punch, Brody was dancing with Sister Mary Agnes. "You're the hottest nun I've ever known," he told her. "Would you consider dating me?"

"I am sorry, Mr. Lovett, but nuns don't date. I have taken an oath of God," the nun stated.

"Forget your oath. I am a hot, red-blooded guy. I can give you so much passion and ecstasy. Whattaya say?"

~*~o~*~

Meanwhile, back in the kitchen, Vicki and Natalie were trying to keep an extremely ardent Roxie off of Todd. She kept kissing his face repeatedly, smearing it with her bright red lipstick. "Get this crazy woman OFF of me!" Todd cried out.

David Vickers was licking herself and barking frantically. She stared out of her doggy kennel at Clint. She suddenly threw herself against the bars as she was drooling.

Marty walked in amid all the chaos. Todd glanced over at her in a state of panic as Roxie slid her hand down his pants. "Todd, what's going on?" Marty demanded. "What have you done?"


End file.
